Aarpaar chi dhamal | Pranit More | Marathi Stand-Up Comedy | Crowd Work Special

Which is the weirdest place you have ever made out?

Tent?

Tent?

G

G

G

Who said G? No, no Tent is fine, right? You went camping

I mean, there's no tent in Decathlon

That's why

He went to Decathlon G is not the word for Golden Ravine Decathlon is like, who is this guy?

What is this? Start laughing is he doing in the show?

Start laughing for Lalit Dhanruta.

Oh, Angiri.

Andi Mandi Sandi.

What do you call Prem Anand?

Shotu Pancake.

What?

Shotu Pancake? It's pancake, right? Then what is shotu? Chotu. Chotu Pancake What? Shotu Pancake?

What is Shotu?

Chotu

Now I am going to get hanged

What is she doing?

Sir, what do you do in life?

I'm a satwi.

Huh?

I mean, I wake up at half past three and go back to sleep.

Hey, go to bed.

You'll wake me up.

No, no, no. Let them go. Everyone, get ready for the show. Today's show is a little special. Because we have two special guests with us today. Okay? Both of them are very talented and very cute. Today's show is a little special because we have two special guests with us. They are both very talented and cute.

You must have seen them. If you haven't, you can go to Badlapur and... So start laughing for Lalit and Ruta. Hi, hi. Now you sit down and you sit down too. We will talk to you comfortably. You too sit down. You too sit down. Yes, yes.

Nice.

Hey, sit here.

You have kept a place here.

She is her manager. Okay? Thank you.

What are you thinking?

What are you thinking?

How cute Lalit looks. And the husband is sitting next to her. He will hit you in the morning. Thank you Yeah What are you thinking? Why are you thinking? How cute is Lalit? And the husband sitting next to you Will hit you in the morning

All the love will not go out

He doesn't have that much courage

He doesn't have that much courage? You hit him?

No, not that much

Not that much?

What's going on?

Have you opened a school at home?

Because of him

Because of him? He pulls it everyday?

Sometimes

Who?

Everyone

Everyone is like that? You do this at home?

It's good, this service is good Okay, good Let's start the show And how many of you want to talk to me? Raise your hand Okay, okay Oh, there are many Okay, okay How many of you want to talk to me? Raise your hand Ok, ok, ok

Those who have shown their wish I have brought money for them I have brought a lot of money So, whichever answer you give I will give Rs. 500 for each answer You know, you must have seen the video

Ok, ok So, let's start the show. Be comfortable Ok, who has raised their hand to talk to me? Ok, show me who all have raised their hands to speak Ok, ok Hey, we are talking to you only, but you are married now, right? Give her the mic

Namaskar, what's your name?

Asha

After marriage, I am Asha

And how do you know Marathi?

I stayed in Nagpur

Born and brought up in Nagpur

So you know Marathi

My mother was Marathi My parents were also Marathi

So everyone in the house is a Turk?

Your mother was Marathi?

Yes she was

Hey hey hey

Enough! Don't get so into religion I want to keep my channel going So your mother is still alive? Yes So why did you say she was there?

She was a Marathi, but now she is a Bengali

Oh, so this brother took revenge He is a great brother

And how did he send you or you sent him?

Basically I proposed him

And what did you like about him that you proposed him?

And how did you like about him that you proposed to him? And how did you propose?

He is caring

He is a nice guy

He is a nice guy? Are we the ones who do the opposite of what he does?

What does a nice guy do?

He cares a lot for nice guys

He is not a nice guy

Okay What does he do at home? Nothing Not good Not good either Ok What all does he do at home? Nothing

Then what? He cares for his a**? What does he do? He orders from Zomato? He's called care?

He's called ashy?

No no, it's like that

Look at how he's looking away, he's like a newbie

Yeah, it's like that

They help a little.

A little help.

Do you say yes or no?

No, never.

Oh. What do you say to a person in love? Yes, tell me.

I have told you for 500 rupees.

Tell me.

I will guess.

Stupid a**.

I knew only one word

No no

Deer is sitting next to you

Who is sitting next to me?

Deer is sitting

Deer is sitting?

Sitting

Deer?

Sitting

Sitting? Can't you say it in front of the deer? Hey deer, close your ears Deer has closed his ears

What are you saying? Hey, you shut up We are a team, right?

Tell me

Shotu pancake

What?

Shotu pancake? What?

Now take the subtitle What does it mean? It's a pancake, right?

What's a short?

Short?

Pancake was fine too But now we know One of it's secret That pancake is small

But what's a short pancake? It's very cute Pancake is small But why is it small?

It's very cute If you are alone

It acts very cute

Like what?

Like a small kid

What does it do? It swings with a curtain What is this cute thing? Tell me one cute thing

It does everything with its legs What is this cute thing? Tell me one cute thing Tell me one Yes yes He is doing the bangles

Oh

You want to wear bangles?

Yes you tell

He is holding it like a child

What is he doing like a child?

That means

He is looking at the mirror What is this sister saying? What is he going to do with brother? What is he doing? What is he going to do? Yes, yes, yes What is he doing? He is poking the board Hey, one minute

You are the ones who are thinking nonsense What is the kid doing? He is poking the board That aunt is also gone There, yes You tell, you tell

We are not going to speculate

No, no I mean, if there is one Then one is If he comes close You tell us, we won't speculate No, no, if there is one, it's a Javadi, or else

Navrao is like, what is she doing?

Javadi and this crying Bro, are you a younger brother or an older brother? How does it feel to be a younger brother? I get it. But now that you are married and live together, do you see any cultural differences?

Yes, like if it's about food or if it's about worship or

No, no worship, I meant for food

What do you eat for breakfast?

We have tea and kurmura that is in breakfast and our breakfast is 7% complete But here, they have breakfast at 10 and then go to the bathroom and then go to the bathroom and then go to the bathroom but here they have breakfast at 10

and they want chapati, bhaji, tea

and everything else

so what's the problem?

we eat everything

we eat everything

what do you say? we put pohe in their tea so you feel a little different so you feel a little different? Do you make it different for yourself or do you eat the same? No, I eat the same.

I don't have breakfast. Because they need food again by 1-1.30.

Why are you saying this?

Such an unrealistic expectation. And I know, if you don't give them food, they cry. And then fish, like Bengalis eat a lot of fish Maharashtrians don't remember me, they eat once

They eat this

They don't eat any non-veg I force them to eat The whole family eats this but they don't eat this

They don't eat fish at all

Okay, so you started making fish and now you eat it

No, I have stopped eating fish I haven't eaten it at all

It's been two months

So you have completely given up on it?

This?

On happiness. But this is the last moment. As a husband, on a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate it?

10.

10? This is complete.

I would rate it more than 10.

What are you saying? You have become so blind It's been a month since I got married I'm coming back next year And I'll break your legs Give her a big hand

Who should we ask? Do you think we should give her money? Yes Okay Who should we ask? Do you think we should give her money? Should we? Okay, we'll give her. Now I'll remove this rubber band so that my money doesn't get torn.

The guys are saying, we've lost our torn notes too. Pass it to her.

Give a round of applause to HRD.

Okay. Who else wants to speak? Wait, don't give the mic. I'll keep it. I think I missed a part. Okay.

There's only one question left. I've taken consent for our conversation. But I'll ask you again. All these conversations will be on YouTube and Instagram. Do you have consent?

That's why I'm here.

Oh, wow.

I think she's fond of humiliating. Okay. Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Krisha Don't say it completely Don't do it, kids will ask you on Instagram And then you'll be like Krisha?

Don't say it completely

Sorry, Krisha

Krisha, I'll tell you later Aren't you a Marathi?

No

But you know Marathi

Thank you

Alright

Krisha, this conversation will be to be on YouTube and Instagram. Do you have consent?

Yes.

Will you be able to do it?

Yes.

Okay.

What do you do, Krisha?

I am an artist manager and I am a poet myself.

But how did you become an artist manager in 20 years?

Yes, I have been a poet since 4 years. So, I have good connections. I applied and got a job after applying So you are not doing a graduation? I did, in psychology

So you have completed your graduation You are in artist management and you are a poet

Yes

So, any poetry?

Should I tell you?

Tell me She is a kid Say something like Dada Dada

But do you know Marathi poetry?

No, I have never written it

This is the fun part Whatever poetry you know, translate it in Marathi

Oh my god

Yes, yes

Will you get 500 like this?

Okay

One minute What do you think? Will you get it?

No? Sure? Okay, if you think? Will you do it well or not? No?

Sure?

Okay

If you fail, I'll give you a slap

Like this?

No no

No no

What?

If you fail, I'll give you a slap

Why?

No no

Sorry sorry

Listen There's a rule in poetry If you like it, you have to do this. And if you don't like it, you have to do this.

No, this is a quote.

When I look at you and tell you that I love you, will you believe me?

No. Yeah No

Okay

Should I say the next line?

Oh, it's not on yet?

No

I'm in character

Poetry is on, should I say the next line?

Oh, yeah, no one will disturb you now

Sorry, sorry

Yeah, thank you

Yeah

Later, will you feed me with your hands?

Do it in Hindi only

You are thinking about something else I won't feed you Eat pedigree

Should I do it in Hindi?

No, Marathi is fun

Later I will... Then I...

My name?

Your name is... What do you call it? I'll take it off. Take it off. Then I look at you and say

I love you.

Do you believe it? No

Yes

Yes Will you search yourself in my poems later? Will you hold my hand later and everything... Will you stay with me for life? I'll hold your hand and drop you to school!

You're a kid! A kid!

Done? Yes

Give her a big hand! You did really well! And you translated so fast! You're really talented! And And you translated it so fast! You are so talented! And do you manage any famous artists?

I have managed Amandeep Khayal,

and Yaya Bhutwala.

The poets? Yes. And do you date anyone now? No. Have you ever dated?

Yes. And what was your last breakup? He was very insecure that I get a lot of attention You won't believe that I get attention

But I get attention in events

Stop it!

No, I was just joking You get attention You are just like yourself

It's you

No, no, he was insecure Yes, a lot You are on your own, right? It's you He calls you a fag No, but he was very white So I told him to go home He was toxic?

Yes

So you told him Will you eat my food?

No

Now you are Anandi?

Yes

Who is the guy next to you?

My friend

Do you have any scenes?

No

If he asks you out for a date, what would you say?

He won't ask me out He is very shy He is a big fan of yours but he doesn't want to talk to you.

He is going for you.

You are hitting me with this ***.

I will kick him.

So I sent one of your videos to him because I really liked it. And I asked him that I want to watch his full video. He immediately told me his name is RJ Praneet So he told me that if I ever go to a comedy show His name is first that he wants to go to a comedy show

So I immediately took out the ticket

You took it out?

Yes

Thanks man, thanks And if... Bro, you are an introvert right? Yes, a little bit Okay, if she asks you out on a date, what would you say?

I'll say yes

You're spending so much money on me

She's watching videos on my expenses

I'm asking you out on a date

She'll say yes She's a cute girl Okay, so where are you going on a date?

Your show.

My show? Not my show. There's no ideal place for a date. Go to Shivaji Park or something. Okay, give them a round of applause. I think they should be given.

What do you think, sir? They should be given? Okay, we'll give them both. You'll pass. Who else is there? Is there anyone else on this side who wants to speak? Once the camera is gone, we won't be able to speak.

What is your name? Malhar.

What do you do? I am doing law.

Where? You are doing YouTube and Instagram. Yes. Who are you on? And you have got the consent to go on YouTube and Instagram? Yes You have got consent?

Yes

Okay, who have you come to meet?

I have come to meet a friend

Okay, what is the name of the friend?

Aastha

Okay, and do you have a relation with her? No, no, she is my girlfriend's best friend

Then she... What is this relationship called?

No, no, no What did you say? His girlfriend is from Delhi She doesn't know Marathi, that's why she didn't come

Okay, so what are you here for?

We both watch your videos That's why we came What is she doing?

She doesn't know Marathi But wait a minute His girlfriend is your best friend Yes And do you find her cute?

No I used to hang out with her everyday Yes Right? Yes And do you find this cute? No

I have fights with her everyday With her?

With him

Oh

And you still watch my videos?

We fight for her I will show her first, I will show her first We fight like this

Why do you do such bullshits?

What?

What will you show her?

We are in a law school, right? Yes. We have different sections. She is in section B.

We are in section A. Are you sure you don't have any scene? No.

I think you are Tara Sotari's friend.

Some people have understood.

Not bad.

My front friend was going to come.

But he got a backache. So he went there for the money. Oh, he went there for the money. So he didn't book the ticket. You have diverted the topic. I am telling the truth.

We have done all this.

No, no. Our section is different.

Different? What kind of Marathi are you? But your girlfriend and the girl sitting next to you block them both I will give you 500 bucks

Will you do it?

No, I can't block Are you crazy in love? Yes Crazy and yes

Let's do one thing You call your girlfriend And put her on the speaker And tell her I say sorry to someone everyday

What do you mean?

He says sorry every hour

No no You tell her

I am feeling sorry for myself

That I am dating you No no 1000 I'm feeling for myself that I'm dating you No, no, no It's Haryana's Diwali 1000 1500 2000 Go ahead

You got it? This is a love affair

Okay, okay, you do it You have to say this, give me, you have to give me the phone. You can't use the phone for 2 hours. Because if you say something, she will message you. A little light.

She will hit me.

I have already put the phone on.

You have to tell this first. Because she will say, I won. I won.

What is this? in your life? You called me, it was fun Did you call me? I cut the call What do you want to do? Do you think you should call now?

No! Show me your hands And how many yeses do you have?

Oh!

You scoundrels! I will tear your a** off And how about this one? Oh, this one!

What a bastard! I'll tear his a** off!

Okay, let's do it. We have to speak seriously. And we have to hear what she says. We have to put the phone on speaker only. And then I'll take your phones.

I won't give you my phone till the show is over.

I'll give it to you after that.

We'll have to do damage control later No no no I'll do that when I get home I'll put the ICCT today

Hello Hello

Yes Nishi, where are you?

What happened in the room?

Nothing

What?

I was about to say, you guys are such idiots

That I'm sorry for myself that I'm feeling like dating you. What?

Block. Block.

Block.

Block.

Block.

Block. Block. Block. The person you are calling is not answering.

I know, I know.

Did you tell her? Okay, yes. Okay, I lost 2000, my friend.

Why should I tell her?

No, no, we know. I know how smart you are. Okay, what do you think? Should I give you money? No? Not both? How can I give the Delhi girl?

How can I give her? They are not saying no I feel very bad from my heart I have some change Should I give them 200?

No Nothing? I have some change in my account. Can I give them 200? No!

You don't want anything? Why? What happened? Are you saving my money? I have a lot of money. Should I give? He said, then give it to us.

Okay, Malhar. You have lost twice. Once here and once in life.

Okay, give them a round of applause.

Who else is there? Okay, you two are here. Is anyone else here? That girl, she came in the show earlier. Give her a round of applause. And then come this way. What's your name? Priya.

Priya, you can talk to her and upload it on YouTube Yeah Instagram will be everywhere You are concerned about that?

Yeah

What do you do Priya in life?

I am a banker

Okay

So basically I am a sales manager

Oh wow!

Which bank is this?

I won't tell you the name

Should I guess?

Yes, do it

I mean, give me some clue Give me your name No, you are very smart You will guess the bank That's right I got it from her face That she is a government's ex-ass Now I know the name of the bank And I know your identity Sales manager means

What exactly is your role in it? So basically we look at the credit cards

and along with...

You are the one who fucks up everything Daddy!

Sir, please take it, sir, please take it

I don't want it

Sir, take a little, take a little

Yes

Convert the EMI

That's it, that's it

Do this work, what are you doing?

So I think I'll give you a brief So, there are total 20 boys So, boys, girls, all of them are in the allocated branches and whatever you said, the calls you get,

that you are eligible for a card, they do that

So, you are a target for them and you are a cumulative target for those 20 So, the target you achieve you get incentives Is it a fixed amount or percentage?

No, It depends.

The more cards you do, the more money you get.

And there is a limit to the cards?

No, no.

What's in that? Along with cards, there is cross-sell too. There is loan, insurance, everything.

It's basically torture.

So, you are a manager now, so you don't call now? No, no. My team does it But there must be a card that you have sold since that stage Yeah Okay, okay

I have done it once

You have done it, right? Okay, you call me And you try to sell it, okay?

What should I sell?

What do you want to sell now?

Oh, card!

Sell Bhaji! What's the HDFC?

You want to sell cards, right?

Okay

Yeah

Hello Okay. Hello. Hey, Tring Tring. Oh, Tring Tring. Tring Tring.

Hello.

Hello, hi sir.

Good evening.

Priya from the other side.

Good time to talk?

What is she saying? Priya, speak in Marathi.

Can we speak now?

Yes, speak. The account in our bank, on the basis of that account you have been given the eligibility of the card.

Yes. Can we talk now? Yes, go ahead You have been given a credit card on the basis of your bank account

Yes

Are you looking for a credit card?

No Why?

I have 4

Then keep another 5

She is my wife

You keep 5 wives?

Yes

What do you do?

You are single?

Yes

Yes Hey! Yes What do you do? You're single? Yes Yes

Hey!

Yes

Is this how you look?

Like, I'll say yes but you'll take it back

Yes

Okay

So

How many cards do you have?

Four

Are you a whore?

Say it again

Four

Then what's the problem in taking the fifth? What do you do with those four cards?

I put them in my a**

Whose? Then put the fifth one too

Very nice! Very nice!

Very nice! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Clap, clap, clap Priya has killed it Okay, okay Give a big hand to Priya Bro, you are not laughing at all You don't know jokes

You, bro, the one who is sitting in the shirt You are sitting with a straight face Is there a problem Aayushab? Did you come to my show by mistake? What happened? You came for the first time?

I said whatever I wanted to, you f***ed it up

Everyone laughed

And you just came like this Never again

Come on, come on

As much as you enjoy Look, there are a lot of problems in life They will be there after the show But at least this one hour is for me. Who else do you want to call? This is your neighbour.

Have you guys come to my show before? No, it's the first time. What's your name? Shruti. Shruti, you can talk to her. You both have YouTube and Instagram. Do you have consent?

What do you do Shruti? I am a QA analyst. QA analyst.

A little closer to the mic. QA analyst. What is QA?

QA.

QA.

I am not asking for a letter, I am asking in full form. Is it quality assurance?

Yes.

Okay. And which company are you in? I won't tell you the company name So it's a big company? What product quality?

We have our own application

We test and send the development work

Is it an engineering type job?

No, no It's totally manual We test the development work

To see if it's done properly

If there are any glitches

Do you like your job?

Yes, I make mistakes

So you will get a job as a mother-in-law

It's fine, we will also be a mother-in-law in future

I feel a little sad Not at all You are Anandi He is your husband

Yes, he is my husband

How did you both get married? Yes, I have a husband How did you get married? Love marriage? Arranged marriage?

And how did you fall in love?

We were in the same company

You do such stupid things You check the quality of men That yes, it's good Testing done

How did this QA go?

Not QA, we were just Normal colleagues Then we got along well Tell us about the queue There was no queue We were just normal colleagues We got along well We started talking Were you in the same team?

No, he is a designer So your interaction was because of work?

Yes, it was We started meeting out of the blue And that's how it started We didn't propose

We just went home to discuss the wedding.

You didn't go on a date, you just went for the wedding?

Yes.

We liked it. I like spending time with people. So he told me at home.

Okay.

And when you told him at home, he was chill?

No.

How did you convince him?

Because he was a little caste-ish.

Like caste? It was a little caste-ish Not caste, she's a Shruti

But it was a Kokani, so the house was ready

Usually when there is an arranged marriage set up They look at the background of the boy, their salary Did they ask you how much you earn in this case?

Yes, everyone asks Everyone's parents ask, what does the boy do? Then ask me Why not? Everyone asks

Why do they ask?

If you are giving birth to a girl, you are giving birth to someone else's child

Is Baba Rothlal?

They are doing it for fun, what do they do?

Lalit will remember now Check the morning He is late

No, he must be a f*****

So, this is what you both like Yes So, when you start dating, office romance is usually a policy of some companies

No, we don't have that It's not like that in policy No, we didn't have anything like that Even in the office, we don't have anything like that

No, no, no

What?

Don't start office romance on the table I am saying Companies have a policy that if you work in one office you can't date Do you understand? Yes

So did your office have such a policy in your office?

Yes, there was no such policy But no one is allowed to do that And we only work in the company

We only talk about work

Hmm, I can see that

Do you feel that this is wrong?

No, why?

What did she say? Love is blind? Have you ever been in love? You don't have blind boys? I said, you don't have to choose. That's what I said. What do you think is the best thing about Navra?

He is very calm.

Okay.

And he is very understanding

So you are short tempered?

Yes

So when you get angry, does he ever...

He doesn't get angry

He doesn't get angry?

I think you are getting angry now

No

You are saying like this, he doesn't get angry He will come at any time, I have told you

Don't ask useless questions Give it to your husband. It's okay, brother. I told you. You seem to be very calm. What do you do, brother?

I'm a UX designer.

UX? UI, right? You have a lot of money, right?

I do. If your skill set is good... Your skill set?

Is good. Not in sending girls. I saw that. I told you that. But... I have a good skill set I don't send girls I saw that, I told you But Do you want an HDFC credit card? But where will you put it?

How many credit cards does he have?

4

Then take 500 How many kids do you have? 4 Then get a 5th one

What? I said get a 5th one Go and find a customer Stand outside the car station What do you think about your wife?

She is also sensible

Even if she is a little short tempered

And do you live in a joint family? No

What do you think will change in your life after marriage?

Now I eat home cooked food

I don't go out much

So you don't cook, you eat outside Is this why you got married? No, we were no. So you don't cook, you eat outside. Is this why you got married?

No, no. We were together for 3 years.

But she said... We were together for 3 years. You lied to her? Sir, arrest her. You said we were just friends for 3 years.

We didn't tag her that we were dating.

It was your situation ship He's caught Tell him

I don't know what he's up to

I'm too old for that

I'm telling you Situation ship means you know what's up How do I tell you? She knows you're Your situation is going on? She laughs like this No, no, you won't like that either

No, no One thing

Last question

Apart from anger, one thing that you think Shruti can improve Can improve The thing that you think she should improve

Life The thing that you think Shruti can improve? Can improve?

I mean, the thing that you think she should improve in life

The short term?

No, not that. That's basic.

Go ahead.

What? What?

What? What?

What? What?

No, no. There is an improvement in that. No, no. Hey, you shut up Don't put your name on someone else's wife Yeah yeah No I think that's it Prema you have gone mad

No I don't think she has improved that much

I just think she's okay

She's okay

Everything is

F**ked up

You should have said she's best

Shruti your slip of tongue is good

Don't hit me

She's ready

Now I'm f**ked up Gabir Singh female version Shruti, your slip of tongue is good. Don't hit me. She got ready and said, Now my turn. Gabir Singh, female version.

Give a round of applause for them.

Who should I ask?

What do you think? Should I give them money? To wife or husband?

Husband? Are you a fool?

Give it to your husband. He controls her anger. What? Are you a turkey? She's like, give it to your husband

He controls her anger

What? You can speak English if you want

Yes, yes

We've gone way ahead of the audience We can talk about anyone Show your hands if anyone wants to There are a lot of people watching

What's your name? Ayush Patil What do you do in life? I'm a BFA student Show me your hand. Oh, look at this. There are a lot of people watching. Yes, brother. What's your name? Ayush Patil. Ayush, what do you do in life?

I'm a BFA student. I run a art studio.

What do you do, Raj?

I have my own art studio.

And I have a tattoo studio.

You have a tattoo studio.

Nice. Is it going to work? Yes Okay, okay What's the story? Just keep the mic close He will tell the story Uncle forced me to

Uncle?

Is he your uncle?

No, no

He is my uncle

And he is his...

He is his friend

Yes, yes

He is actually my aunt's brother Why the f*** are you telling us? We are here to know about your grandchild Tell us what's your problem? Actually it was a breakup story Okay, I'm very sorry that you broke up

If you're not comfortable, don't tell me There's no need I have to tell you You can't come to my house after the show Decide now

I'll take out the credit card

Credit card?

And where will you meet?

Okay, tell me

So, we had a fresher's party And the cutest girl in our college I danced with her

You? I picked her up

Why did you pick her up? I was dancing Don't put the mic on You were dancing You picked her up Yes consent took her up How did she consent?

While dancing she asked me if I took her up I said yes Then we got a video from our college And my girlfriend saw it

Your girlfriend was different? Then why did you take her up?

She was cute

She was a college crush So you took her up Yes

And your girlfriend was also in college No, she was in another college How did she see the video? I had WhatsApp with her You had given her your WhatsApp login

Yes

You are so toxic Yes, she was She was and you picked up the girl So what happened?

She got too toxic and said let's go live separately Where? You just pushed her away Okay, so what happened next?

She got really toxic and said Let's go live separately Where? Aurangabad Chhatrabadi Sambhaji Nagar Chhatrabadi Sambhaji Nagar, sorry

No, you mean you were living together?

No, no

Then?

She wanted to run away She wanted to run away from you? She wanted to run away from you? Have you ever run? She is a national player National player in baseball

No, no, no, Jogi

What? You are laughing at me? Okay, okay Then she said, let's go live somewhere else

Then what did you say?

I explained to her She said no Then I went to her that she said no and went to her parents to do this Oh you... And the opposite happened to me

Oh you got a police case too?

Yes

What did they say?

Her parents wanted to arrest her Why? Because he takes girls on his shoulders? Actually the police created a scenario where I was running after her forcefully The police had seen the chat that she had forced her to go

So they did a matter-solve And that girl said something? She turned around

She said no? No, she started crying in front of my dad

So you broke up?

Yes And that cute girl? She is my senior Do you feel ashamed? No So you broke up with her? And that cute girl? She is my senior Are you ashamed? You are still on her

You are a tattoo artist How many tattoos have you done? Do you have any on your body? No Are you a skin tattoo artist?

No no no You see that on Instagram Today on my chest That's your ideal, right? No, it's not even that

Then a customer came to you And he said I mean, a girl She came and said that she wants to get a tattoo I have a story about that too You have a story about that too?

I liked that girl who left She's gone for a walk And I think her father is also with her Actually, a couple from UP has come to my studio To get a tattoo So the client was not comfortable to get a tattoo in a private place Private place means who? We had to get it on the chest, below the collar bone She said all the family members are watching

He said, it's our woman, we are watching It doesn't matter to anyone, let everyone see Our means his and yours? His, only his I was like, I'm watching it, it's my wife I'm watching it, no one else cares I mean, no one cares Our wife means his and yours His, only his I was watching her as a client But were you going to close your eyes and get a tattoo?

You were going to watch it too? We were covering it, there's a bandage inside

What were you covering?

We were covering it

Because they knew your intentions So she said So he said yes I got scared So? I got scared

You got scared well?

Yeah

I mean

Yeah

I have clients like this

Okay

You are very professional in this field

I have been in the tattoo field for 6 years Okay

What is the name of your studio? Ink Effect Tattoo Studio Okay, follow him on Instagram And his chest Okay, okay I am a tattoo artist What is the name of your studio? Ink Effect Tattoo Studio Follow him on Instagram And give a round of applause to the one who got the ticket

You tell me You are the girl in the grey t-shirt Do you think he should get the ticket? Yes, he should Anandirathi

Give him a round of applause.

So, what we'll do now is... For the special moment we've planned this show for... So, let's call Lalit and Ruta to the stage. And we'll ask them the same question.

No. We'll ask them something worse.

You've brought a letter?

No. What is it? A sketch. A sketch? Wow, show me. I should ask her something worse than this You brought a letter?

What is it?

It's a sketch Show me

Oh my god

You did a good job I just feel like I'm eating a little bit of gutka You feel a little bit right? just feel like I'm eating a little bit of Gutka. I feel like it.

I'm not eating it.

It's just a little bit. Okay, good. I'm not going to give you money. Because money reduces the value of art. You've seen the video, right? Good. I'll give you another gift for that. Give a round of applause for HRD.

You guys guys comfortable? Okay?

She's scared

Are you guys scared?

I've given you a mic to speak

I'm very scared

You're very scared?

Lali, you're comfortable right? No, no, it's not like that But, yeah, it's the first time But, yeah, I mean, yeah You know, I mean? They must have an actor at home

Do you think we are stupid? I have met Lalit a couple of times When I used to work in radio I used to go for interviews in award shows That's when I met Lalit I have never met Ruta

I have met her for the first time today Because we don't usually meet beautiful girls So do you have any beautiful friends?

I doubt they'll meet you

Oh f**k

500 rupees? 500 rupees to f**k me? Okay, so there's a movie of these two It's called Arpar and... They've also got R-Par Subtle integration

It's a good trailer I like the movie But the concept is a toxic love story Let's ask them What do you think? What is a toxic trait about you?

It's extreme Yes, tell me

I am extreme

But what do you do that is extreme?

Love

What have you done that is extreme?

What everyone does They lose their self-respect

We don't do it

So you didn't do extreme love?

No, we value ourselves

That's what I said

That's what I said

Look, the girls are clapping All of them are girls Get the f**k out You tell me I'll give you an example When you don't respect yourself Like Samoaj is giving you a warning

And still you feel you are madly in love And you still do it And then you realize it later I've been like this for many years

Many years

But do you have any best friends? I'm not asking about my friends No, no, usually Best friends are correct

They stop you My best friends usually... Best friends, correct They stop you My best friends didn't do that They said, let her eat the soil

Let her eat the soil?

Yes, let her eat the soil

Her name was Aastha She said, I will tell you before How is Roota doing?

No, I mean they said She will fall, she will stand But she will understand herself Because But you will understand yourself Because if you are in love, no matter how much you tell, you don't listen

Is it true?

That's why girls are like that Boys listen to you Just like boys listen to anyone who says no I doubt it Lali, you tell us, what is your toxic trait? I get bored very quickly

Now he has finally said something nice Okay, so how much? After one night? Depends. Depends?

He's saying it so hard Lali, you're single

Girls want to know Are you single now?

Yes. Are you?

Oh, so hard Where do girls approach you?

From everyone From everyone? And you don't use Whatsapp Yeah, right. So, where do girls approach you? Everyone.

Everyone? And you don't use Whatsapp, right? No. This is not about Whatsapp. Both of you are not on Whatsapp. Him and my grandpa.

But how do non-actresses approach you?

I don't know.

Instagram?

Instagram?

You are married. You are married too, right? Yes, I know. Instagram? Instagram? I don't know. I mean, you are married.

You are married too, right? Yes, I am. You are married too, right?

Okay, then you keep quiet.

The chair on which you have already put the handkerchief. Do you have any kids now?

I mean, kids...

It's the kids' job to put the handkerchief.

No, no, no. One minute. Now you're married, so...

It doesn't matter to the kids. It doesn't matter at all.

Why do you do this, Lalit?

Okay, Lalit. Let's ask you. Lalit, a lot of kids approach you on Instagram. What's your type? There's no fixed type? Is there any?

Edgy?

You guys are so dumb

He is telling about himself Yeah, he is telling about himself

Let's ask them some edgy questions Okay? You'll have fun? Okay, good Yes Yes Yes Okay? You'll have fun? Okay Good Huh Let's start from Lalit

Okay?

Okay?

He's more upset because of him

No, no, no

I mean Instead of asking the girl directly First ask the boy And then come to the girl My father taught me this Which is the weirdest place you've ever made out?

Tent?

Tent?

I mean...

I mean...

I mean...

Who said G?

Who said G?

Who said G?

No, no...

No, no...

No, no...

Tent is fine, right?

You went camping, right? I'm not saying that he's a f**ker I'm saying who is this guy? Why is he shaking his head? He's good, he's good. He's testing me

Okay, okay. Now you tell me

I don't know if it's weirdest but

We'll figure it out

Car

Car is very common

Exactly, it's not that much of an experience

I got married early

You got married early I think this is written for Lali He didn't even ask a question He was like, what is this?

What's your answer?

No

You also have a no

No

Have you ever tried dating apps?

No

You haven't tried anything?

No

Why are you telling me such a stupid thing? Okay, let's play a game I will put a song in your headphones. I'll say a few words. You have to guess what I'm saying with lip-sync. It's called the Whisper Challenge.

Okay, good. Who wants to go first?

Okay.

Boiled egg. Boiled egg. Okay Ukadleli Andi Ukadleli Andi Guess something

One

Wait

You have to keep guessing something Okay? Then only it's fun

I don't know anything

Okay

Ukadleli

O

Kanni

I look like a South Indian I am not Ukad leli O Kanni I look like a South Indian, I am not.

O and giri

Andi mandi sandi No, no, it's okay.

Ukad leli andi, okay? But it sounded good. Next, no. It was a boiled egg. Okay? It was a boiled egg.

Boiled egg.

But you did well.

Next.

I fell.

Yes.

Hard feet.

Hard feet.

Soft cheeks.

What?

Hard feet, soft cheeks.

Hard feet.

Soft cheeks.

Cheeks.

Cheeks? What does it mean? Where? Naram Gaal Gaal

What does it mean?

Where? Kadak Pav is there, credit it

Kadak Pav

Naram Gaal

Kadak Pav Naram Gaal

Nice, nice

Ambat Shaukin

Ambat Shaukin

Ambat Shaukin

It's a trick, right? No, it's correct

Maha kadwa

Maha kadwa

Maha kadwa Maa

Maha kadwa

You also say it, I don't understand

Maha kadwa What? Hey...hey...hey

Yes

Maha kadwa

Ma kadwa

Okay, it was Maha kadwa

Maha...

Let's try one word No! Let's try one word If it works, it's fine I'll say half the word, you have to complete it

Definitely, I can't do it

Burly mood Burly mood At least guess what I'm saying Bharli

Bharli

Ma

Everyone is saying Ma

I know

Bharli

Kadi, that's all I know

You know it well

Bharli Moot I understood it as in Cur-dy You understood it well Burly...Moot...Moot

Moot

Moot

Boot?

Moot Moot?

Moot!

Moot! Thanks

She's happy

Now she's saying Marley

Burly Moot 4 lakhs She's happy now Now she's saying, Marli...

Filled with a mood of 4 lakhs I'm not going to get this

You've tried a lot Now give it to him Filled with a mood of 4 lakhs I'll never get this You don't know Mani Lali, your Marathi is good

Mine is better

Okay Can you hear anything? No, right? Is Marathi good? Better than mine Now you'll understand Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Can you hear anything?

No, right? Okay, yeah, okay

Take and throw

14?

Oh my god

Now it's a bull's eye

Take and throw Take and go Take and throw

Take and throw Take and go Take and throw Yes

Correct

Chavat Manus What?

Chavat Manus

Manus?

Chavat Tu tu

Chavat Chavat

Aargh

Chaan chaan chaan

Aarpar

Please

Aarpar

Aargh I thought you were going to say dance bar

Bhosri You shut up

What is it?

Bhosri

I guess it's there Listen to it You want to hear it right? Bhosri Hard hard hard

It's good

Alright

Gandul Aloo? No

Gandul Heu Not Alu Gandul

Come on, try to understand

Ga

No

Galu Galu

F***

We got one right

Gandul

F***

Again?

Oh no, sorry sorry

Oh Gandul Gandul You try it Gandul Sorry, sorry Gandul

Gandul

You try it, you tell him No, no, you don't have to try it, you know the word Come on, say it, lip sync it

Gandul

Ga

A

Gandul Gandul A Ga... Ga... Gaandool

Gaandool?

Nice, nice

I was right, I was up to the G** There's a difference between G** and Gaandool There's only one animal, one human

I was up to the G**

Do you remember who all are G** in your opinion? No one, you're give me 500 but okay Sandhya Kaloli, all of them are like, yes, yes, we are f**ked up Okay, let's do a pun, okay? Let's do a pun, okay?

Kaavlecha

Kaavlecha

Gaau?

No, Kaulacha Kaulacha

Gaura...

Au...

Kaulacha

Chao chao Kau kau Kau kau

Kaulacha

Kau kau?

Kaulachi Kaka'sya cha Kaulya cha

Kaulya cha Kaulya cha Kaulya cha Kaulya cha Kaulya cha Shapa ne Shapa Kavla cha shapa ne gaay marat nahi Okay, okay. Everyone is feeling it. Okay, good. Let's do an activity. If you want, you can do it. If you want videos, you can do it on YouTube and Instagram.

Okay, you have to assume that you and Lalit are on a date. Okay, and first... I mean, you guys have chatted on the dating app. You guys have chatted on Instagram and you are on a date. Okay, so you two are on a date. You are meeting for the first time and you

you okay, in the movie you play a toxic character and I become the waiter okay?

Don't call yourself a waiter Don't be so nice You eat

uh

okay

okay?

Who am I? I am toxic You are a toxic guy

You are a f***ing boy

okay? You are a toxic boy You are a toxic boy You should play with Lali

Ok

Ok, I will talk to him

What will you do then?

Should I bring a tent?

I don't know him

You have been on Instagram And you have a date You are meeting for the first time You are meeting for the first time

So firstly I will ask

No no don't ask You have to role play Look at him and talk to him directly

So hi Lalit

What do you do in life? First of all, Lalit is not here

Sorry Can I call him Aditya? What do you do in life? First of all, I don't have a girlfriend Sorry, sorry

Can I call him Aditya?

Why?

I made a mistake

Ok, Aditya

Hi Aditya, what do you do?

This will be difficult What's your name in this movie?

Amar

What do you do in life?

I play football.

What are your expectations from your partner?

He should be available when I have time. I am playing it because you have told am playing it Don't make any stupid jokes

Okay, so what are your expectations? I can be available for you whenever you want

Dosa?

Dosa is good, should I get it? Madam, that's our Kurkuri Are you laughing? Tell me. Are you here to sit idle?

I came alone.

Then who is this?

What will you eat?

What will you like?

There is no such thing there! It's dosa time!

Do this one

How do you feel about the combination of biryani and beer?

Biryani, beer and you?

Okay

Nice Should I bring beer?

Yes

Dry day

Tanmay, you come back tomorrow Tomorrow there won't be anyone here

Lalit will not be here, only you will drink

I think he will come His character will come

Oh

Who all think so? I think so

Oh

Give a round of applause for these two Who all think so Do you think this game is good? He raises his hand till his nose and then he goes like this He does this till his mouth Do you start every time? Should we take him? Are you sure? Are you sure? Or you want to do it?

What? He got angry last time No, you take it Where is the mic? Tanmay, pass it Now, do you want to do the Will you be a waiter or something else? Let's do one thing. In the hospital...

Let's do it. Okay? In the hospital... Do you have fantasies?

I have a fantasy. That two people will date and I'll be a waiter. Dosa, dosa, dosa.

A very poor fantasy. You do it, I'll bring the dosa. Dosa Dosa Dosa Poor fantasy You are saying I should bring dosa

Operation I am a f**king husband

Okay, wait Hospital scenario Your grandma is sick Is your grandma there? Yes, yes Both sides? Yes, yes. Okay, fine. Do you have a grandma on both sides? Yes. Okay, fine.

Grandmother?

Yes.

Okay, fine.

Don't hit him.

He'll cry and say, I'll bring my grandmother. So, she's in the hospital. She was a little sick, but she got better, so I admitted her.

Okay?

So, I... Why a a doctor? I am a poor man. I will tell you.

You be a Vod Boy. Let me know your fantasy.

Okay.

I am a Vod Boy.

Okay.

Your grandma...

is a scoundrel.

And who is she?

We were talking about her.

She is a nurse.

Ruta.

Salil.

A nurse at this age, a nurse?

How will I get an intern? Hey, she's a nurse too

What did you see? Beautiful girls don't talk like this

Hey, shut up!

What the f**k are you doing?

She's married, she'll get married

I'll stay with you Okay, I'm a ward boy

Be a nurse for a while, 10 minutes

Okay, I'll be fine She's a nurse And. Be a nurse for 10 minutes. Okay.

She is a nurse. And she is a famous nurse. She is famous on Instagram.

Correct.

I bet you don't know. You are admitted today. So, the operation is going on. You talk to her. Nurse is outside

She'll be the plate

Sister?

Sister?

It's a male

Number one! You're a sister, I'm a brother! Don't say sister, say excuse me! You're being silly!

I'm not!

You're an intern, now you're saying sister!

I didn't know what would happen!

You said yes, right? You say it, you say it! How is she your sister? I didn't know what would happen I didn't know anything You say it

Excuse me Yes You were in your grandma's room Can you tell us how is she?

I have to ask this

At least say it

Sure?

Better She is getting better If you have time, tell me Better Better? She is getting better

If you have time, can we go out?

Now it's good, right? You go

Grandma's oxygen has reduced And who will take care of the nurse?

After the shift?

Yes.

But do you have time then?

I have time for you.

Okay.

Now you come in WordBoy.

He is watching from the corner.

I am watching grandma.

Grandma's hand!

Give a big hand to Yanjhi And give her a round of applause No, no, what was your name?

Okay, good

Did you have fun?

Give a big hand to Lalit and Ruta Yanjhi's movie is releasing on 12th September Did you have fun? Okay, let's give a round of applause for Lalit and Ruta. Okay, so... Her movie is releasing on 12th September. When you come home, watch the trailer, the teaser, whatever it is. And show the same love to Marathi movies as you do to stand-up shows. How did you feel when you came here?

I feel the most important thing is that it's a full house. Praneet, so good.

Thanks a lot.

And it's really, really good. And seriously, I mean, she's 20 years old. I didn't have any guts at all. I don't know if I still have, but man, you interact so well. And I had only heard about the crowd work,

but I saw it for the first time. So hats off to you. Thank you. And the sense of humor and the presence of... So good. Maini tujhe videos paayela, maini tujhe aatmandi hi sangitla ki maasi papa tujhe major fan hai. But I'm so glad, thank you. Aani tani sangitla chahiye ki aar paar nakhi baga. Toh maini please baga. Aata jaisa full house kela hai, 12 September aamjiye doghan chahi Oh! And our film is releasing on that day. So everyone, please give us this gift and please pull out the show.

Because it is really very important. We have only one song now. But if many more come out, please...

What?

It was going well, what to say? They are still searching, it hasn't come yet.

No, for that we have do another show for success. Amazing. I was like you, when we met at the Radio Awards.

Since then, I've been watching his journey. Really proud of you. I feel, like everyone else, where he started, what he did, but to perform here,

you need guts. And the way you handle people, without hurting anyone, even then it is very difficult for them I feel that everyone can't do it

you have to be there for them you can't learn this thing that you have so please keep on motivating us and you too

hats off to you for the way you take for taking everything so sportingly So thank you so much for coming to this show I think this is the first time we are promoting a Marathi cinema in a stand-up show Because our film is about such toxic people

You all are f***ed I'm not going to say anything now I'm going to say everything

The things you like the most The things I've been hearing Your problems Amazing We might be thinking What's going on

What the f**k is going on

Here it comes

The second live show But It's going on. What the f**k is going on? It's coming, it's coming, it's coming. I'm saying something else.

But, the people in that relationship, they feel it's too much. They feel, no, this is it. Let's kill it. So, the film is like that.

But, it's very proper, intense and it's not like the love you get in the beginning. You won't get that see such a love like Arpar in the past You will get to know the relatability of it now Take your parents and show them this If they don't understand your problems

They will understand after watching our film Our film is coming on 12th September Do watch it in the theatre Watch the teaser, you will like it I guarantee you will like it Give a big hand for both of them

See you at Ar next Success Party. See you at Ar next Success Party.

Thanks a lot everyone.