EJERCÍ MI DERECHO A LA EUT4N4S1A (CON: ANGELA FLÓREZ) I Vos podés el podcast - EP 202 I

There are stories that do not end with goodbye. Angela Flores dreamed of inspiring others with her life. After facing diagnoses, surgeries and fear, she decided to leave in peace, with death worthy as a path. Her family entrusted us with her wish. And here you are, Angela, present, bright, luminosa, viva en cada persona que te escuche. El 10 de noviembre de 2025, tu luz no se apagó, solo cambió de forma. Este episodio es más

que una entrevista, es un abrazo eterno. Today I am joined by an immensely brave woman, a woman who with absolute consciousness, she made the decision of how and when to leave this world. This episode is not about death, it is about freedom, freedom to decide. I join Angela, or rather we are joining Angela. And I say we because we are here in her house with our team and her family. Angela, thank you. Thank you for this wonderful opportunity.

I dare to say that it is one of the strangest, most complex moments for us as a team. This had never happened to us, but I want to tell everyone what happened because I consider that this is a diocidency. I have no doubt that this is a date from God so that we were today in front of you in the intimacy of your house. Today is November 9, 2025. Yesterday, November 8, Saturday, I was at home, lying down. Suddenly, I took my cell phone and I was checking my social media.

You don't know this part. When suddenly I see a message among so many, Angela, I get thousands of messages a day. Can you imagine? Yes. People who greet me, people who send me messages about their lives, and suddenly I open up a conversation that catches my attention.

A conversation of a woman named Natalie. You probably know who she is. And Natalie writes to me to tell me that you, tomorrow, 9, you make a decision that you will tell us later. That for her it was very important that we fulfill this dream together, because you also have a board that I had the opportunity to see,

and on that board you said, you can do the podcast. un tablero que yo tuve la oportunidad de ver y en ese tablero manifestaste Vos Podes el Podcast. Así que gracias a Natalia y a tu tía y a tu familia y a nuestro equipo y a todos los miembros de tu casa, porque son muchas las personas involucradas en esto, estamos aquí. Nos desplazamos, nos desconectamos de nuestro estudio convencional, estamos We move, we disconnect from our conventional studio. We are in the middle of your living room, accompanying you, by hand, in your decision. So this is not an interview, this is a meeting with you.

Thank you very much. Oh, Natalie, thank you very much. I love you very much. Did you know this? Did you know that Natalie had dared to send me a message like this? No, no, I didn't suspect it. We were talking a lot these days because we have a similar process. And this morning I saw that she had deleted some messages, I don't know what time he wrote, but I asked him what time, but since I've had so many messages, I couldn't answer him. I mean, I don't know what he would have answered me, but no, I didn't expect it. I didn't expect it. I say that this is from God and that Natali was the bridge for us to meet today. You mentioned the dates, because this is very important.

Tomorrow is November 10th. What happens tomorrow? Tomorrow I will exercise my right to have a worthy death. And...

And then I'll pay him the day after tomorrow.

I don't know what else to say at the moment. And what goes through your head at this moment? When you think about all that date? Well, let's say that at this moment I feel very calm. I have had a loneliness of emotions, I have felt a lot of sadness deep, but I felt very calm, I was not afraid, I did not have anxiety, I felt very calm. I think it is something that I was talking about with some of my doctors from the palliative care team that has attended me during this process at the Columbia University Clinic.

They told me that sometimes many of the patients who make this decision feel calm, and I feel like this.

How old are you today?

35 years old. And you are a veterinarian? Yes, I am a veterinarian at graduated from the National University of Colombia. I would love to know about you, your story.

Tell me, how has your life been during these 35 years?

Well, it has been a very hard life about my health process because... I mean, this whole process of the disease has been quite long. Let's say that a good way to start is to tell you when my symptoms start, which is approximately from my was 12 years old. What I felt was that I lost the strength of my left leg. It was like the first time it happened, or the first memory I have of that is that I was playing like in bed, jumping, and when I jumped from the bed to the floor, I lost my strength and I fell straight. And that was one of the first times I felt this symptom.

My mom took me to the doctor. The doctors just checked my leg. At that time I was a little bit fatter. And they told her that it was because I was fat they told her that it was to get her attention, that it was psychological that they would take me to the psychologist and that they would never go beyond that

they simply said that information This was getting worse over the years until I turned 20. Let's say that if at that time I met someone, I had to tell them, hey, if you give me your leg, that was, that the whole leg, that is, the whole left side of my body began to lose strength and I fell. You were weakening. Yes, I was very weak and I had to try to fall to the floor. So I would say, hello, nice to meet you, if you can help me with my leg, help me fall to the floor.

I didn't lose consciousness, I didn't have convulsions, but we would go to the doctor and the doctors did not check me further, they just said that my leg was fine. This is coincidental, when I entered the university, it was in the second semester that we saw a subject called physiology and there I met our professor Manuel Rojas,

who was the one who was teaching us the part of veterinary neurophysiology. At that time, I told him, as a professor, what was happening to me, I told him what was happening to me. In one of the classes, I decided to do an explanation of de uno de los temas que era electroencefalograma y básicamente pues explicó el tema en la clase conmigo. Me puso como los electrodes en la cabeza y enfrente como de todo el salón en una silla y fue como trata de dormirte vamos a explicar el tema después él hace como este examen conmigo él me llama pues como en privado y él me dice que vio algo extraño unas ondas epileptiformes y él me dice tienen que

revisar de la cabeza porque tú tienes algo en el cerebro

o sea fue tu profesor el que detectó lo que tenías I had to check your head because you have something in your brain. So, was it your teacher who detected what you had?

Basically, a veterinarian, a veterinarian doctor, was the one who diagnosed me, who is my teacher, who we could say saved my life. At that moment, he told me, you have to go for emergencies, exaggerate as much as possible, because they have to check your brain. Coincidentally, during that week, I woke up one day totally paralyzed. I did not feel my left side, I had a very strange sensation, I do not know how to describe it,

it was just like my leg and my arm were not part of me. I could not move them or control them. We went to the San Jose hospital for emergencies and there it was the first time that I said, I'm leaving here without having my head checked, please. There they made me a resonance and they discovered that what I had was a brain tumor. It wasn't psychological, it wasn't because I was fat, it wasn't that I was going to lose weight, but it was a brain tumor.

So, to put it like that, my professor was the one who diagnosed me with a veterinary doctor. Incredible. What starts to happen? Is that at the age of 12 when they identify your diagnosis or at what age? No, at 12 the symptoms start, but it goes on until I turn 20. Ah, you lasted a long time without knowing the diagnosis. Eight years without diagnosis because we went to the doctor and they simply said,

it's because you're fat, you're weightless, he's a psychologist, go to the psychologist. Ok, and at this age, when they identify, they name what you had, how do they start to take care of you, the recommendations, I imagine not very aware of what was happening, it was simply like, well, you have a brain tumor, go and authorize, authorize papers, authorize the neurosurgeon to see you, because they have to check you, they have to do other types of resonances, like with contrast, specialized subjects, and well, go for it and the EPS process begins, like waiting, there is no appointment with the neurosurgeon specialist, they authorize badly, they do not authorize things, the wait is more or

less 5, 6, 7, 8 months for a neurosurgeon to see him. So, let's say that maybe at that para que lo vea un neurocirujano. Entonces pues digamos que tal vez en ese momento no fui como muy consciente porque es como ah bueno un tumor en el cerebro que la vea el neurocirujano entonces pues uno como que dice esperemos a ver qué dice el especialista pero pues como toca esperar a que me revisaran pues no fui como muy consciente de lo que I was not aware of what was happening, the seriousness of what was happening. And when did you get alarmed? When was or with whom was this appointment that gave you clarity of everything? No, this was, I was finishing the semester at the university and I introduced to work during the holidays. I went to an

interview in a clothing store and I was going to the interview in a Transmilenio. This was maybe a Sunday. I was going to a full Transmilenio. My memory is that I was standing in a Transmilenio, I was going to the mall, and I was going to the interview. Let's say that my next memory is that I was in an empty chair, and I stopped and got off at the correct station, but very automatically. When I left, there was a police assistant who came to me and said,

Are you okay? And for me it was like, yes, because, I mean, it was very strange to me, like, yes, I'm fine. And the insurance, yes. I started to enter the mall, I arrived at the interview, they sit me next to a boy who was also going to present the interview

and he, before presenting it, he says to me, hey, are you okay? And I say yes, why? He says, what happens is that I saw you convulse in the Transmilenio, you fell and you turned purple, almost blue, and you started to throw foam in your mouth and convulsing. So, at that moment, I was in shock. You hadn't remembered that event? No, because it was a convulsion.

It was the first time I had a convulsion and I didn't remember what had happened. If that boy had not come to the interview and told me, this happened to you, I don't know what would have happened.

So, of course, when he tells you that this happened, what do you do?

I call one of my friends from college and I tell her to pick me up because I had a convulsion. She went to the mall to pick me up, we left together and when I entered the station I started to feel bad, like dizziness, headache, so we talked to the helpers and called an ambulance. The ambulance arrived and my next memory is that they were putting me in a bed and I had another convulsion. So I don't remember the trip in the ambulance either, I just remember when we entered the hospital.

So I had many convulsions during this journey, although I don't remember much that happened, I had a lot of convulsions before entering the hospital. I imagine that you are already convulsed, you are already hospitalized,

there they already discovered some signs of alert.

Yes, they hospitalize me urgently and I lasted 5 days until I had my first surgery. This was also a very strong scenario for me because they tell you that you can die, you can be totally paralyzed, this is very serious, you can touch your brain, but if I have an emergency surgery, it was like when I left surgery, I couldn't move absolutely anything in my left body, that is, the whole arm, the trunk, the leg, and then here begins the rehabilitation process to move again the left side again. Okay, and what did you have to do?

Did you get back to normal mobility soon?

With the therapies and everything you did?

Yes, I lasted like a couple of months in rehabilitation and let's say that, well, normal. The therapy helped me a lot. Let's say that at that time, as it was the first time they touched the brain, and the tumor was not so big, it was easy to rehabilitate. I mean, it was a hard process because I had to cancel my semester at the university,

I had to use a diaper because I couldn't move very well, but after a couple of, three, four, 5 months, it was back to normal. Do tumors remove them? Yes. In the brain, what happens is that you can't make margins, like, touch beyond the tumor, so to speak. For example, if you have a tumor in the skin,

doctors can do a margin to try to avoid some cells that obviously are not visible to the eye, but in the brain the difficulty is that you cannot touch a healthy brain because you can generate other infinities of sequels. Sure. At that time, well, always, in theory, when they operated on me, they removed the tumor completely, but what happens is that they can't make margins, so there are always cells left there.

You mentioned that it was the first surgery. How many surgeries did you have, Angela? I have four surgeries in total to remove the tumor on several occasions that I have had. Today, the reason why I made the decision is because this is the eighth relapse that I have. The tumor has come out eight times in total.

A cancerous tumor.

Yes. Well, at first, when I had histopathology, well, cancer is classified as in 4 degrees, 1 and 2 is benign and 3 and 4 is malignant. At that time, what they diagnosed me with is a benign grade an astrocytomapilositic grade 1, benign. And at what point does it go to the other phase or to the other level that you were mentioning or has it always been benign?

No, that was then in 2010, I was already 20 years old, let's say that there the doctors what they do are like magnetic resonance controls every 3 or 6 months. They start to space it out as they see the evolution. I lasted 2 years without relapse, and in June 2012, they observed the tumor again, I imagine logically, not because it had symptoms or anything,

but they could see that it had grown.

If you could explain this to us in a very simple way,

what was happening in your brain every time you had these relapses? The tumor was getting bigger and bigger. In the second surgery, which was in 2012, it changed from a grade 1 to a grade 2. Then it started growing again and they decided to do a radiotherapy. I was also studying at the university, so I had to give up academically and go through a chemotherapy process where

my hair fell out in the area, I had nausea, vomiting, signs like digestive, diarrhea, and I still had to study. Every time the tumor has come out, it grows because unfortunately doctors can't make margins in the brain because it's impossible, they can't touch a healthy area of the brain without generating other types of sequelae. And physically, do you feel any type of deterioration over time and with each of these surgeries? the a caress was painful, instead of a pleasant caress. It's not something that causes pain.

It was like the touch of clothes that caused pain, or if I was caressed, it caused some pain. And from there, from the first surgery, I began to suffer from migraines. But in reality, I didn't have any other symptoms. I didn't have convulsions, I didn't have anything else, nor did I lose strength.

When did you feel like you were already at a limit, like it was something you couldn't stand? This happened in November 2022, which I remember that day very well because I started to feel a muscle pain in my leg. And it's like when you go to the gym, you do a lot of exercise and then you

can't sit down, it hurts a lot the muscle. And I felt that, but I hadn't done an exercise that matched this. I had to go for emergencies because this was progressing and the tumor had grown a lot, it was something that had no reverse so at that moment it was when I could't walk again, I couldn't move my leg, I couldn't move my arm, that was in that moment. And that's when thoughts start to pass through your head, what kind? That was the first time I thought about euthanasia, because it was a very drastic change from one moment to another, in which I could ride a bike, I loved riding a bike, I could walk normally, move normally, and

let's say that due to the resonances that they made, it had been evidenced that the brain already had an irrevers brain damage from the tumor. So this is the first time I think about euthanasia. I request it, but at that moment they deny it to me because there were treatment options, such as chemotherapy and immunotherapy, so they don't accept it. And when do you feel, or rather, do they inform you that there is no treatment? Because I assume you did a lot of evaluations before making these kinds of decisions.

Yes, let's say that this has happened very quickly, since 2022 that the tumor starts to come out again more or less every 6 or 7 months, that is, every 6 months it comes out again, so they decide to complement me with oral chemotherapy, it lasted a year in chemotherapy completely and it comes out again. At this moment, let's say that something happens that is a medical negligence, because they decide to irradiate me, that is, in the brain, by means of a resonance you can see how the area that may look like a tumor can be confused with a scar or radionucleosis.

Let's say that they make me an interdisciplinary meeting and they say, how the tumor does not come out again, it must be irradiated again. But what happens, at that time my oncologist was not available and a couple of months later when I talk to him, he tells me that they must have made a resonance with a spectroscope and perfusion to differentiate if what was growing was a scar or radionucleosis and they irradiated you unnecessarily, so let's say that for that moment it was the third irradiation that I received and it was an unnecessary irradiation. So, this has been like many things that the health system in Colombia has failed me,

to the point that this disease has progressed so much that it has come out 8 times, and for this moment there is not much to do because it is growing very fast and I am more paralyzed than normal and that is why I am making the decision to stop with this suffering. What are the consequences of that irradiation that you mention, that your oncologist said was not necessary? Well, let's say that irradiating the brain unnecessarily, or good, healthy tissue, is what can cause a tumor to grow. So there is no way to differentiate today

if what was growing was because of that irradiation or simply also the aggressiveness of my tumor as such. What I have at this moment, my tumor mutates from the third surgery of an astrocytoma pilositic grade 2 to a holy astrocytoma malignant pneumorphic grade 3 and what I have is a rare disease, it is not an orphan disease but it is a rare disease. It's not an orphan disease, but it is a rare disease.

I imagine you had many conversations, especially with doctors, to understand what your future would be, speaking at the health level, at the body level. What would that future be that the doctors mentioned?

Well, when I become disabled, they told me, she's going to have a mild MIPR, she can walk with an orthosis, with a cane, and I started the rehabilitation process, I improved a lot, but nevertheless, I did need the support of a cane and an orthosis, and I entered the classification of physical disability, without possibility of recovery because the tumor invaded the area of the motor tracts of the brain,

so basically there is not much to do. And do you feel that this, in the future, could represent something for you,

if you had decided to move forward with this process?

Well, that little by little I lose my independence, which I've already lost in a great amount. I have always been a very independent person, I have always done everything alone. And what hurts me the most is losing my independence, that is, not being able to move alone,

needing support to be able being able to move alone, needing support to be able to go to the bathroom, to be able to take a shower, not being able to go out alone anymore. So this is something that affects me a lot.

What is the main reason why you made that decision?

Basically because I have been suffering from this disease since I was 12 years old. I am 35, which means that I have been suffering for 23 or 24 years of my life, suffering from chronic pain, from fights and struggles against the health system in Colombia, against the EPS, against medical negligence, of which I have been a victim on multiple occasions. And that's why I'm very tired of having to fight against the system, to complain, there are never appointments, there are never specialists, they never give medicines, it's always like, they authorized this wrong,

it has to be authorized like this, everyone gives a different information, and it's quite exhausting, like, feeling that my life is a constant fight against the health system, against the disease itself, because I'm already going through enough pain to have to fight for a long, to get to a point where the tumor is invading so much that it doesn't allow me to move. It's horrible to have to depend on so many medications to remove the pain. I suffer a lot from migraines, neuralgia, chronic pain,

I also have Hashimoto's thyroiditis, which causes me hypothyroidism, endometriosis, I saw, medical conditions have led me to want to have at least a dignified death, since I couldn't have a dignified life that the health system in Colombia did not allow me. You said that initially they didn't accept that decision.

When did they approve it?

This was basically October 6th of this year. Yes. I mean, not that particular day, but what happened on October 6th was that that day I started to feel my arm different. Like that moment I told you I felt a muscle pain, as if I had done a lot of exercise, that day I felt a very strange arm.

I had to go to the clinic, by coincidence that day I had my control resonance that day. We saw that the tumor was growing again, it was about 3 cm. From October 6 to today, everything happened very fast. I was hospitalized three times. It was at that moment that we saw that the tumor was growing very fast because it was, from October 6, three months ago, the resonance was fine, it was all, I was always very judicious, I tried to have all my appointments on the day, my

resonances on the same day, if it was October 6, that is is 3 months after the accident. I try to be very judicious with that. It is when we see that the tumor has grown a lot and very fast. And then it has progressed very fast. She has been hospitalized 3 times. At that moment I decide to tell them, please, let's activate the euthanasia protocol

because I don't want to lose my independence anymore. They told me that they were going to hold the medical meeting and they called me a week later and they had told me, we approve it. At that moment I was with one of my physiotherapists who has also been a great support in my process, some home therapists who have been an important part of my recovery.

And they tell me, well, we approve it it and you have to give a ratification, that is, you have to tell us at this time or send a letter or ask for a palliative care appointment to say, I ratify the decision to do it or I say, I better not do it. For things in life, that next Tuesday I had a palliative care appointment. But that weekend, again, what happens to me is that I have a convulsion in the house. It was very strange because, well, I was alone at that time. And from one moment to another I stopped feeling my leg totally

and I started to feel that feeling of 2010 when I had the first convulsion, which is like an aura, like a strange pressure around the head. I started to feel that, so I said, I'm going to have a convulsion, this is very bad. I managed to throw myself towards the apartment door and I opened it. I fell to the floor and started screaming for help.

For things of life, some neighbors arrived that I knew from the floor below. They are the ones who call an ambulance. This paramedic arrives, who tells me, asks me what happened. And I say, no, I had a convulsion, but I didn't lose consciousness.

When I was convulsing, I could talk to him and tell him that I felt very bad. He tells me, convulsions are not like that, what you are having is an anxiety attack.

Really?

Yes. We waited like an hour and forty minutes waiting for them to give me the authorization to take me to the ambulance and an hour and forty minutes later they tell me, no, you have to go to your meds because you don't deserve an ambulance. Because what you are having is an anxiety attack the convulsions are not like that. You have to lose that interest, you have to disconnect completely, which is false because there is a type of convulsions called focal convulsions. And one does not, I mean, what happened to me, that I could continue interacting, but I was having a convulsion.

And what did that mean for you? Do you feel that this event marked something very important for your decision? No, it was just like the same experience of being against the system, trying to explain to it how things are happening to me, and you are minimizing it by saying that I have an anxiety attack. So, it is very difficult, this what you have are symptoms of a disease.

For example, if a man is having a heart attack, then the symptoms are revealed. And a woman can express the symptoms of a heart attack in a different way. And women can say, no, you are having an anxiety attack. So basically it's like the experience of sexism and misogyny in medicine. And when you ratify the decision? Well, at that moment I go with my mom,

my mom arrives and we leave urgently, because of our own means, because it was like, no, they didn't authorize me to take her because that's an anxiety attack. We arrived at the Columbia Clinic, which is where oncological patients are treated, where I have received my attention in the last 3 or 4 years. We arrived there and there was a Monday, a holiday. So, I had to wait until Tuesday, when I had my palliative care appointment,

where I had to get a ratification. My doctor arrived, he has been a great doctor, among the few that exist. He has been a wonderful person. I think that my family members who knew him, from these last hospitalizations that I had, saw that he

was a great person. However, he tells me, well, how did you get approved? The idea is that you say if you ratify it or deny it. Remember that there is no pressure, take your ideas I had so many relapses, he told me it's a little difficult to tell you how long you can live, because you have exceeded life expectancy, because it is not normal for a person to have cancer 8 times. So, at that moment I was afraid to put a date. And I decided to deny it because I was a little bit certain that oral chemotherapy could help me. However, that week passed and again on Sunday I had a very strong paralysis, I even felt like something was wrong in my brain. Again, I had to be hospitalized, and an ambulance arrived, and they immediately took me away, without any problem

because I was losing a lot of strength they took me to triage, I arrived as if I were in an emergency there I said again that this is very bad, I got to 80 and I felt really down. And I was like, this is not good. And then a festival came up, because it was recently, during this week. Previously, when Sunday came, they did an emergency tag for me to check if I had bleeding or edema.

And that the tumor was not as such, but that I was having the symptomatology from a brain bleed. The other day, which was a festive Monday, the neurosurgeon told me, you have bleeding, you have a lot of edema, and the tumor in two weeks has grown half a centimeter, that is, it is growing very fast and it is not very good. So on Tuesday, the palliative care team arrived again, we talked a little more about the subject and I told them, I want to do the euthanasia because this is not okay. I stopped feeling my arm, my trunk, my face. I needed oxygen at that moment. And they had to check how I had rejected her.

They had to see if I could being within the space of a few days of being able to say yes, yes, yes, he rejected her or suddenly it could be reversed, that no and if it was like no, no problem, we accept it and you only have to choose the date that Tuesday, well, I thought like of a couple of days to say goodbye. So I told them to go on Saturday the 8th. But they don't follow the procedures, they do it on the official schedule.

Monday to Friday, and...

There's a schedule.

So it was going to be done yesterday?

Yes, I had planned to do it yesterday, but pues no lo hacían porque no es el día en que lo hacen.

Para ese momento ya te habían dicho con claridad que lo tuyo era una enfermedad terminal. Te dicen 18 meses. ¿Es así?

Sí.

O sea, sí me habían dicho eso, pero como en este mes ocurrieron tantas cosas tan rápido, But, like this month, so many things happened so fast, it was like, it's not 18 months, but it can be much less. You can do chemotherapy, but I decided not to do anything else, because I don't think it's having quality of life. So many things ended when I had already done so much. I have had four surgeries, I have had onetonomy, you just have to choose the date.

What did you think to choose that date?

A couple of days to say goodbye to my family, my friends, my girlfriends, to explain to them what was happening. I wanted a couple of days to say goodbye to the people.

That same day when you talk to the people in charge of the procedure, that same day they approve your date? Did you find out that the date was going to be the 10th, that same day?

Well, I had said that it was Saturday, so it was like, you can't do it on Saturdays, it has to be like during the week. So I asked on Friday, but what happens is that they only do one procedure a day and there was already one procedure. So, Thursday seemed like a very close call to me because that was on Tuesday. So my doctor, the doctor I told you about, who has been a great support, he tells me, well, I have a proposal, which is the home hospitalization.

So let's see if it can be on Monday. You go home these days and come back on Monday, and that's the procedure. So he asks and they say, yes, Monday is available. And that's when I decide to take Monday as the date to have the euthanasia. What did you feel in your heart to be so sure of your decision? I'm tired of being sick all my life. I have to fight against the system, fight against the doctors, so that they believe I'm sick, so that they help me control the pain,

and the fact that I can't move well and lose my independence and that I don't want to end up... I've had so much pain that I don't want to get to a point where I start to agonize or where I can't make a decision even though I have some documents of anticipated will where there is all this information that I do not want to be done anything more and a person is going to do as exercise my right to euthanasia.

But as at this moment I am fully aware, it is for what I have decided to do it as soon as possible, and that's what I'm going to do tomorrow.

Who was the first person you told?

My family, my mom, my aunt, my sister. Did you do it in person? Were you at home? No, I was hospitalized and I spoke with my mom, my aunt and my sister. How did they make this decision, this news? It has been very hard for everyone. I mean, there is also something taboo about believing that the patient is the only person who suffers, but the family, friends, and the nucleus,

that tissue, that support network, also suffers. So... They are the ones who... I tell them how I decided and they have supported me in this whole process. I have never felt judged, I have felt very supported for making this decision, because they have accompanied me through this whole process, I mean, they have suffered it with me too,

so I have felt quite supported for by the decision. Talking about death is a taboo. And it is a very delicate topic when it is a personal decision. Here we speak to you with absolute respect. But it is very difficult for me to understand what has gone through your head during these days that have been very few

since they gave you the yes until today that you are at the door of doing this procedure they say that when you have the opportunity to say goodbye it's a kind of inventory

Well, it has been very strange because it is the first time that I have had the opportunity to talk to many people, with my friends, with my colleagues at work, and to have the opportunity to say goodbye consciously, but I felt like I was dying and I couldn't talk to anyone. It was very nice because we had a meeting yesterday, and it was very curious because the common room has two rooms, let's not go too far,

and in front of it they were celebrating about 15 years and we were celebrating death or the opportunity to exercise a right, which is a worthy death. So there were a were many tears, while on the other side there was a tremendous mess.

Life's things, right? Have you had the opportunity to forgive and ask for forgiveness? and apologize.

Yes, I've had some very nice opportunities to talk to many people, with of friends, a lot of friends, my family, which has also been a bit painful throughout our lives, like many other issues. And I've had the opportunity to re-mean a lot of things, to ask for forgiveness, to let go of many feelings that one carries, sometimes anger, so much pain. And it is very strange because in these days that everything happened so fast, I have simply felt a lot of peace and tranquility. It is very strange, I don't know, I mean, I've been asked several times

what I feel and I only feel peace and tranquility. There are moments when I feel a lot of deep sadness because it's not as simple, but I have had the opportunity to forgive and talk about things that maybe you have taken for granted when you are well. What do you carry in your memory, in your heart? I would like to leave a legacy that for me were the animals. Since I was very little I have felt very connected with the subject of animals, of nature, of caring for the environment. And it took me a long time to... my tissue and my support network

told me to continue this legacy. And I speak a lot about what inspired them. It's very nice because I have received many beautiful words from many friends, from many people who have surprised me, like, what those words told me, because having my life so full of pain, I have always had self-esteem issues, I've never felt good enough.

I've always thought I was sick. People have expressed things about me that are totally different. So I got a lot of inspiration from this to continue the legacy of taking care of animals and the environment.

Do you love animals? Do you have cats? You left some kittens

Yes, I have three kittens For me, they are my everything It hurts me a lot to leave them, but I can't stay here anymore

For anyone, I'm suffering a lot. I'm hurting a lot to leave them. But I know they will be in good hands because many people have offered to take care of them, like my mom, my sister, and many others, to support them. So I feel calm with this part. One of my best friends, Carla, who showed me this podcast. She also offered to take care of my kittens and many more people.

They are many of my friends at work. I have had one of the best jobs as a researcher at the observatory of the Institute of Animal Welfare and Protection and there I found some great friends, a very beautiful support network, and they have also offered me a lot of help, friends from the university who are veterinarians. So I feel calm that they will be in good hands. What are your kittens' names?

One is called Neblina, the other is called Inanna, and the other is called Quiara.

Have you told them about your decision?

Yes, it has been very difficult and they have been very stressed these days. But my friend Carla will help me to try to handle this situation with them. It is very painful because I would not like to say goodbye to them, nor to my family, nor to my friends. I'm tired of suffering. The health system in Colombia has been failing me since I was a little girl. And that's one of the reasons why I'm like this today. I don't know what could have happened if I had been diagnosed correctly at 12 years old.

It's not like I'm why I'm like this today. I don't know what could have happened before. If I had been diagnosed correctly at 12 years old, it's not like I would have known. But... The Colombian health system totally failed me. There were a lot of people, but it totally failed me.

Do you believe in God? That has been a very conflicting part of my life because I have had so many painful experiences throughout my life that I have fought a lot with that. I mean, I don't think... It has been very difficult to reconcile this in my heart because I couldn't find a religion or something that would make me feel totally calm.

I've always felt like... that it's not fair to have so much pain. So it's not that easy for me to answer that question. But nevertheless, I think there's something that we don't understand. And it's like magic and I don't know, it's not that easy to understand. That's what I think. I don't know, it's not that easy to understand. That's what I think.

But in the midst of your struggles, did you try to approach spirituality, that God, communicate with Him, even ask for your healing? Yes, I've done a lot of things from the spiritual side to try to heal not so much because... I mean, there was a point in life

where I thought, why is this happening to me? but then it became like, why is this happening to me? maybe the why is's to unite many people in my legacy, which is to take care of animals and protect them. One of my dreams was to have a foundation where I could rescue cats and dogs. I feel that it is my legacy to do that other people, if they can achieve it, they will be able to do it in my name. That's what I feel.

I was telling you at the beginning of this conversation that I saw a board.

That board is located where? In your room?

Yes.

And on that board there is like a checklist. I saw several things, several sentences. Among those, there was the podcast, there was a list of countries. This board, what does it mean to you? Well, it was one like, it was like several of my dreams, I wanted to travel because, let's say that throughout my life, because of all these situations of illness, the economic situation

has not been so easy. So I wanted to travel, well, to visit several countries, Japan, Greece, Iceland. And my idea was to make a podcast telling my story and be able to raise money to travel. Even at some point I thought, well, if I don't manage to travel, that money will be left to a foundation to help animalists. And that's what represented for me the opportunity to fulfill my dreams. And one of those was to be on this podcast.

You were with a dream come true. Yes. I think that was like the face of surprise when I entered here. I think it will be reflected there. More than asking you questions right now, Angela, I want to hear you. Sometimes you keep so many things in your heart. And surely you, you have already made a very clear decision.

You have said a lot, you have talked, you have also talked to yourself. But I want you to share with us what this step in life has meant for you and also share with us what you want to share with us. Well, I would like to share at this moment that I love my family a lot, I love my friends a lot, there is also a person who has been with me in the last few days, Juan Camilo.

I want to tell you that I love you very much. And I will always carry you in my heart. Also my mom. My brothers. My grandmother, my aunts, many of my friends. I love you so much, Carla. Natalie, you were also a fundamental part to make this dream come true.

And like all the people who were visiting me these days, I told them I love them very much. That's what I would like to say right now.

What have you learned from life?

I consider myself as... Well, I feel that I learned how to be a very empathetic person. Because I have been expressed through so much pain that I have suffered, how empathy is towards other beings, for other situations that other people live, not to be indifferent to the pain of other living beings, not only humans but also animals. That's what, That's like that gift

with which you leave life, empathy.

Yes. Like...

Not being indifferent to the pain of other living beings.

How do you want to be remembered, Angela?

Um... What do you remember, Angela?

Like a person who always gave everything, despite her own pain, to help others. I don't know, I mean, that people don't have that indifference in front of the suffering of other living beings. Who is accompanying you here in your house today? My mom is here, my grandma is here, my aunt is here, my friend Carla is here, my cousins are here, there are very important people who have accompanied me throughout my life. And what do they represent for you? My support network and my support in such a strange and difficult moment. difficult. Is there something that you have been keeping an eye on?

For speaking, for saying? Any of them? No, yesterday was a very beautiful moment in which we were able to express all of this. So, at this moment I feel that things may be missing.

However, So, at this moment I feel that things may be missing, but nevertheless, if it becomes necessary, I know that maybe we will feel it in our hearts. What we saw was what had to happen and how it I be? In this podcast, surely many people are listening to you many women, many men, girls, adults not only in Colombia but in different parts of the world who must be shocked to hear you

moved, touched, surprised What do you tell all the people who are listening to you? We can be as selfish as human beings, believing that we have power over other beings, like animals, that we are not the center of the universe, that we can help and be more empathetic with other forms of life. I would like that.

You are about 12 hours away?

Yes. I have to be at the Colombian Clinic at 7.30am tomorrow for the registration. And it will happen in the morning. Do you think about that time and what goes through your mind? No, just with a lot of tranquility. I will also be accompanied by a very special person that I want to name, Julia. She is also a great person that I met, who is an oncological patient. She has an orphan disease in Colombia.

There are only two people in Colombia who have it. She is a gypsy. She is a psychologist and also works as a duel and death transit in terminal patients and in oncological patients. She is going to accompany me tomorrow and I I feel very at peace at this moment. Are there five people coming with you? Yes, they authorize the entry of five people. that helped me to make that transition at that moment. My mom, my sister, my grandmother,

sorry, my aunt, and my brother too. Is there something you regret? Maybe not being able to help more than I would have liked, like not having fulfilled the dream of having my own foundation to help animals. But I know that many people will do it, they will give a grain of sand to be able to achieve it. How did you imagine that foundation when you dreamed it?

Let's say that there is something that happens in animals and that is that there are some that are not so easily adoptable, such as those who are disabled, the old ones, so there is a person that I do not remember her user but she is in the United States and she has a cat foundation, that is, they are I have cats that are from people like grandparents or people who die from diseases. And I don't know, they are old cats that nobody wants to adopt, right? Because normally it is like adopting the young cat or buying it, right? So my dream has always been to try to help the least adoptable,

which are the animals that have disabilities or that have diseases or that are old. So I imagined how to help those who are less adaptable. That was like my dream. Any other dreams pending? Many, no... I know that many people will give a little bit of sand in what we talked about yesterday to be able to achieve it.

I just think that... What went through your head when you wrote the name of this podcast? I don't know. It was all because of Carla, because she was the one who gave me the idea, how come we do, we gather the money to make your trip, I love this podcast, and well, there I started listening to it and it was like I put, you can, and it was always there, I was like, well, you can. And I was always there. I was even there when the form was going to be filled out.

But, I don't know, you always let it pass, right? Like, I have time and everything is permanent. And no one is aware that at any moment, you't die. It was always one of the big dreams I had, to tell my story of health, of how I lived with this disease and to have achieved my dream of traveling.

So, for me it's like fulfilling a dream a couple of hours before. Is there anything I can do for you? No, you've done a lot coming this far and making this... exception, I don't know how to call it, but you've done it. Thank you very much.

I don't know way to say goodbye. It's not a goodbye either. Because wherever it is, or whatever it is, I will wait for you there. I will receive you with many animals too. recirco muchos animalitos también

tenías dudas sobre Dios

porque fue Dios el que me trajo acá Because it was God who brought me here. I want you to know that despite the decision, and not knowing what awaits us, on the other side, He loves you. You are important. I know He will receive him in his arms.

And if you also receive him and open the doors of your heart, you will be with him in eternity.

Thank you.

Thank you for welcoming me to your home.

No, thank you for coming here. Have you thought about what's on the other side? No. No, at this moment I don't. I just have a feeling of peace, of tranquility, that it's beautiful, it's without pain and suffering, and that is very beautiful

I find it hard to understand that when you are watching this episode you are not going to be there

but I stay with that joy of having met you if it were a couple of hours. Thank you very much.

You made me have a very pleasant moment. You made me reaffirm the purpose that I have in life and the love I have for animals, believe me, it gets stronger when I hear you and that I will have you very present. Thank you very much.

Something you want to close this episode with? Well, let's say that I would like to have a meeting to commemorate all my friends, my friends, my family that they go dressed in colors and that they bring food for dogs and kittens and that they take it to a foundation and that they help as much as they can and that they are not indifferent to the suffering of these beings that are so vulnerable and which we have abused for centuries.

Thank you, Angela. Have a good trip. Thank you. I'm going to ask you a favor. If you find my grandfather, greet him for me.

What's his name?

Vitalino I know I'm going to find him I've been asked a lot something like that by many of my friends have asked me for something like this. I know I'm going to find it. And of course I will.

Thank you for allowing us to be here. I hope I have fulfilled this dream and been up to the task. I hope I have fulfilled this dream and been up to the task.

Of course.