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RFK Jr Flees The Scene?! MTG Vs

RFK Jr Flees The Scene?! MTG Vs.The GOP! | HIGNFYUS

Have I Got News For You US

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♪♪

0:04

Welcome back.

0:06

It is time for Lie Curious. I give you three biographical details about a public figure, but only one is true. You have to guess which is the truth and which are monstrous, despicable lies. Time for three facts about Kash Patel.

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Seeing here, finally learning which ones were the good guys in The Sounds of Music. Our facts are, he briefly went back to high school in his 20s. He appears as a juror on three episodes of Law & Order. He moonlights as an ice hockey defenseman.

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Wow. Which one is the truth?

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I feel like it can't be number two, because that would have been a meme a long time ago. And I am imagining being a defendant as an ice hockey defenseman. Wow. Which one is the truth? I feel like it can't be number two, because that would have been a meme a long time ago. And I am imagining being a defendant, and your life is on the line, and you look over at the jury,

0:52

and that dude is looking at you like that.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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Truth is, the answer is number three. Kash Patel moonlights as an ice hockey defenseman. For over a decade, Patel has played hockey on weekends for a club team that is, oddly enough, called the Dons. Now, Patel had a bit of a scandal involving a recent flight he took, Question.

1:17

Does anyone know why people were upset about his aviation habits?

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Because his girlfriend, who he took the FBI private plane to visit, is a country music star that nobody's heard of.

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People were mad because Kash Patel reportedly took an FBI jet to watch his girlfriend, country singer Alexis Wilkins, sing the national anthem at a wrestling event.

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She looks like what you would put on the package at Spirit Halloween.

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And it would say, American woman.

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I see it.

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That doesn't look like a real person.

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The FBI director kind of has to take a private plane everywhere, because he's the FBI director.

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Could you imagine Kash Patel, like, boarding Group C?

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Um...

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Southwest?

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If there were, like, turbulence and you looked over?

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-♪ ♪ -♪

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Now, it's important to point out that FBI directors are actually required by law to travel in a government plane for security reasons. So who is it that insisted that the FBI director taking a government jet is a bad idea?

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There can only be one answer.

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Yeah, we know how this show works.

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Go take their money. Chris Wray doesn't need a private jet. We're not the guys running around on private jets. And somebody, maybe in Congress, should ask for how many flights on a private jet Director Comey took

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or my predecessor, Director Wray, took, and how many personal trips they took.

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Oh, no, my own words!

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FBI! That's the i-i-i... -♪

3:05

Time for three facts about former Speaker of the House and lady who wears high heels in the swimming pool, Nancy Pelosi.

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-♪

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Our facts are she had five kids in six years, she owns exactly one pair of blue jeans, she went to college on a drum scholarship. Team Michael, which one is the truth?

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You know I want to see a clip of her... Of course. ...in a drum line.

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like the dude in the subway.

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Yes, yes.

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Yes.

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We are voting for that, and by voting, I mean praying.

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Yep. I'll give everyone on Earth $8 billion if this woman can play a drum.

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Number two it is.

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This bitch ain't got but one pair of blue jeans.

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Nancy Pelosi had five kids in six years. The former Speaker of the House married her college sweetheart, Paul, in 1963, and by the end of 1970, they had five kids. Four daughters and a son.

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I think I know what happened there. The son is the youngest, isn't he?

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Four daughters and a...

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He was... She was like, -"Look, one more go, man." -$5,000.

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After that...

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Come on, son. Damn! Daughter again. All right, come back. Come back. Come on, son. This time...

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Ah, damn.

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I don't think she calls them kids. I think she calls them constituents.

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Speaking of Nancy Pelosi, she made a big announcement this week. What was Nancy Pelosi's big announcement she made?

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She's still alive.

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Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! -♪ Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha to Congress. And then it cuts to a wide shot. Pfft! Pfft!

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It's all I want.

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Pelosi is retiring after nearly 40 years in the House of Representatives. She was the first female speaker in American history. And regardless of anyone's political views, these are great accomplishments. Question.

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How did Donald Trump commemorate this occasion of Pelosi retiring?

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Oh, he sent her a fruit basket.

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And he said, good riddance.

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Close enough. Point.

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I got a point! Michael!

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Um...

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Oh, you can have it.

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Thank you.

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Donald Trump posted on Truth Social saying, quote, I'm glad to see the stench of Nancy Pelosi go.

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Dang, he said stench.

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That's a classy brother right there.

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That is.

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That's like something a troll says in a fairy tale.

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And maybe Pelosi knew something like that was going to come up, because she let something slip this week. Does anyone know what it is?

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Just listen.

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Our founders did not want to have, again, a... How can I say this? It'll sound like I'm awful about Trump because he's just a vile creature. A little sling on the face of the Earth.

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But, anyway...

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That's how you talk when it's your last day at the job.

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Yeah.

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This has been Lie Curious. More after the break.

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♪ ♪

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Welcome back. It's time for Meeting the Middle, where we find common ground between two different people. Tonight, it's a oops, all Trump administration edition. On one side, we have Dr. Minnette Oz, Sean Duffy, Marco Rubio, Linda McMahon.

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On the other side, Stephen Miller, R.F.K. Jr., JD Vance, and Howard Lutnick. First up, we got Pseudonym. Which two of these cabinet members have been on the receiving end of a nickname by their current boss, Donald Trump?

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So, it's Rubio, right?

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Rubio. And-and the Sofa King, right?

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I'm gonna say it's J.D. Vance, and I'm gonna say he called him Lady Eyes.

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-♪ ♪ -♪

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Yes, Marco Rubio on the left side. And Stephen Miller. Oh. Have both been called names by the president. Reports came out over the summer that Donald Trump refers to Stephen Miller as Weird Stephen.

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And everybody remembers Trump's nickname for Marco Rubio.

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I call him Little Marco. Little Marco.

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I call him Little Marco. That's what he is. He's Little Marco.

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Little Marco Rubio. He's Little Marco. Little Marco Rubio. He's going around, he's going crazy. Don't worry about it, Little Marco.

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7:50

Right. So little now he fits in Trump's pocket.

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Yes.

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Next up, we've got Maga the Stallion. Which two of these people are featured on hip-hop tracks?

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Linda McMahon and the dude at the bottom whose name I don't actually know.

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That's Louis C.K. The voice. -♪ I'm your brother, I'm your brother... ♪ -♪ I'm your brother, I'm your brother... ♪

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Like, you don't even have to put an effect on it.

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Right. Like,

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♪ Babes, how long can you go? Death row. ♪

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-♪ I'm your brother. You know? I'm sold. -♪ I'm your brother. In the 2024 presidential campaign, RFK Jr. hopped on the track Standing on Bidness by Drummer Boy.

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I'm Robert F. Kennedy Jr. As president of the United States, I'll be standing on bidness

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and helping the community.

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Hey, yeah!

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Ooh, some...

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Ha! Michael has to get points for the impression.

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Yes, points. Yeah. Amazing. I got 99 problems, and the Tylenol ain't one. Which legendary hip-hop MC's track did Dr. Oz pop in on and drop a verse?

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Vanilla Ice.

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It was Michelle Obama.

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Back in 2013, Dr. Oz appeared in a music video for Michelle Obama's Let's Move campaign. Here he is.

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-♪ Dr. Oz, what's up, Dr. O? -♪

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♪ Time to get involved, let the whole world know ♪

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♪ Just the other day, they see me on the show ♪

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♪ Didn't know I had style, didn't know I had food, for sure. ♪ Dr. Oz, we're both at an event in the Oval Office on Thursday to promote Trump's plan to reduce the cost of weight-loss drugs. Does anybody know what went down... at this event?

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Oh, a dude. A dude went down.

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A guy fainted.

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One of the attendees collapsed in the middle of the event. And before we show you this clip, do not worry. He's okay.

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We've been advancing science and creating high-value jobs. But today, we...

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Oh, are you okay? Gordon, you okay?

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-...sweep the chairs. Okay.

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Just watch what R.F.K. Jr. does when-when Buddy collapses.

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...sweep the chairs.

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Hold on!

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No, fuck it.

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Damn! No, I ain't gonna...

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Uh-uh. He got something wrong with him. I ain't finna catch it. Like, if I pass out right now, you're supposed to at least give me the courtesy, -"Are you good?" And then leave. -$5.

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I agree with Roy. It's like when you know someone else is gonna pay for dinner, but you still kind of go for your wallet. Like, you pretend. At least do the fake care.

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10:53

I found that to be a totally relatable moment. I don't know CPR. I should probably go find somebody who can help.

10:59

You're also not in charge of America's health. All right, let's do President Evil. Which two of these people were video game characters? Ooh.

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Team Michael. Linda McMahon. It's got to be, right? Because you're wrestling shit.

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And then I think JD Vance was a character where it was like

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you had to try to get the eyeliner on,

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like, perfectly straight.

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Team Average, what's the guess?

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Well, look, Bald Man is a mystery to everyone. In two minutes, they'll say his name. I'll forget it then.

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Yeah. What's his name? Howie?

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Howie Mandel. That's who it is. We'd like to go with Howie Mandel and Linda McMahon.

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Linda McMahon and JD Vance have both been featured in video games JD Vance is a playable character in the election simulation game the political machine Take a look

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That was the most boring video game I've ever seen in my life.

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Is that real?

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Yeah, it's him flying around promoting Hillbilly Elegy. The video game is his book tour.

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Linda McMahon is a playable character in WWF No Mercy for the Nintendo 64.

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Great. That's what I want. That's, I'm a bad boy... ♪ -♪ I'm a bad boy, I'm a bad boy... ♪

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Great. That's what I want. That's what I want Wendy McMahon to do.

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That's awesome. That was a public school teacher she was slapping. Yeah. We didn't get to Sean Duffy and Howard Lutnick, but they both come from reality TV. Sean was on The Real World, and Howard actually got his start as one of the pimples on Dr. Pimple Popper. More after the break.

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♪♪ -♪♪ -♪♪ -♪♪

13:01

Welcome back. It's time for the Offender Meter. Teams have to tell us who's the offender, what they did, and who they offended. Here's your offender. Who that is?

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Marjorie Taylor Greene.

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Yes, that is Marjorie Taylor Greene, seen here pulling up to a Chick-fil-A on a Sunday. Who did Marjorie offend?

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She's offending me every day now, because this reinvention that she's doing of Marjorie Taylor Greene as reasonable centrist makes my skin crawl.

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What?

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So she offended you?

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She offended me.

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Marjorie has offended Republicans in Congress by speaking out against them on the government shutdown. On The View this past week, Marjorie got pretty specific about who she's blaming.

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The worst thing that I... that I just can't get over is we're not working right now. And I put that criticism directly on the speaker of the House. And we should be at work. All the people sitting in this audience,

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they go to work every day.

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No, they don't. They are the audience of a daytime talk show.

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The one place we know for sure they're not is at work.

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Yeah.

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Maybe because of the shutdown.

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Yeah. So Michael, you don't believe that was sincere. She had, just go back to the first frame of that. She had the white woman hand on the heart. When the white woman put your hand on the heart with the Jesus cross, oh

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This is infinitely less fun

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So all of the people she has attracted by being a piece of shit. She's now

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Repelling them because she's trying to be sweet

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she's on the right side of right now. Ding, ding, ding, ding. It's impossible she'd be on the right side of two things, huh? Ha ha ha. The congresswoman is starting to feel some feelings about the Republicans' plans for health care.

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Here's why I'm angry. The Democrats passed Obamacare, but yet the Republicans have never done anything to correct the problems that exist with it. And I blame my own party.

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She did the thing again. I saw it. She did the thing again.

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When a white woman does it, you be like, -"Ah, you telling the truth." -"Okay." This is the very same woman who claimed people are controlling the weather, the same woman who called for Nancy Pelosi to be executed, the same woman who said the Parkland shooting

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was a false flag, the same woman who claimed California wildfires were caused by a secret Jewish space laser.

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In fairness, that one is true.

15:51

How does Marjorie Taylor Greene explain her former beliefs?

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A stroke. Medicine. She got... She found Jesus?

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I actually thought her response to this was kind of genius. Somebody asked her about QAnon, and she's like, do you regret that you were so invested in QAnon? Because that's how she made her bones. And she was like, I was a victim of social media.

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To her past views, Marjorie Taylor Greene says she's so totally over them.

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Would you say you don't believe in the QAnon conspiracies

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anymore? QAnon conspiracies anymore. Oh, I went over that a long time ago. I mean, we can... So you've changed. Well, no, I haven't changed. I was a victim, just like you were, of media lies and stuff you read on social media.

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Let's rank this shit, all right? If you ever thought Jewish space lasers were real, you're too stupid to drive a car.

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You're too stupid to drive a car. It's too stupid.

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If the spirit is screw her forever because of what she used to stand for, is it possible to ever come across the aisle? It's been 60 seconds, Roy. If you're suspicious about MTG's transformation, you're not alone.

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17:01

Here's AOC digging into what she thinks is the reason for Green's transformation. You're not alone. Uh, here's AOC digging into what she thinks is the reason for Greene's 180.

17:08

The White House and Trump land shut down Marjorie Taylor Greene's personal ambitions to run for Senate, and she has been on a revenge tour ever since.

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That's, like, straight out of Mean Girls. Like, somebody means... You can't date the popular boy, so now you're gonna go back around. Like, that's... that's a... that, I believe, is...

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So then, to that point, if you were a Democrat, what is wrong with revenge health care? Is that not still health care?

17:34

I mean, you take the vote. I mean, you take the vote.

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You just don't have to hang out with her. ♪♪

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